Hey Lover Boy................(Baby #2)

After my first son turned 18months old, I just wasn't feeling quite right. Pregnant? No way, I can count how many times on one hand! I'm getting ready to start nursing school in January, me and hubbie we are working together to try and make both of ourselves happy, and lil' man is just now walking good, toddling around, bringing us joy despite all the other things we deal with on a daily.

I don't know what told me to go in that store and buy a pregnancy test. And can you imagine the looks I got anyway, "she has a baby and is buying a pregnancy test to see that she is getting ready to have another baby............is she nuts?" (I have always been worried about what other people think, I am still trying to work on not caring!) I pull into the driveway, check the mail axiously, (I had been waiting on my acceptance letter to Nursing program), got in the house, lil'man ran off playing, I sat on the toilet, p'd on the dumb stick that was going to ease my mind about how I had been feeling, and started to open THE LETTER..................literally, in my left hand I held my future(the acceptance letter, I had been granted into the Nursing Program) and in my right hand I also held my future, (MOTHERHOOD, a second time around)! And to top that crazy, wonderful moment, my toddler comes to the bathroom door, "ma-ma", and the bottom let out, (tears people, not what could be insenuated here). I was crying again. Another emotional pregnancy.

The pregnancy followed through pretty much like the first. I was not able to finish nursing school at the time. I fufilled one semester and then took a leave to have my baby that summer. Again, I had the same Doc, who was very good, I have nothing bad to say about him. I had actually begun labor on my own, but as so many believe, labor is painful from the start, it was not for me. I actually did not even realize that I was in true labor. I went for a routine NST, ( I battled high BP with both pregnancies), and they admitted me because I was in active labor, (BTW, I still wasn't hurting, I actually felt good). Once fully admitted they augmented my labor, (PITOCIN), and things got ugly! Again, I was able to manage, however, this time I didn't even want the stadol because it had made me so looney and itchy last time. My baby was born healthy and safely at 4:49p on a Thursday, and I retore in the same tear as with my first birth.

This birth was even better. I was still not aware of a lot options, and the statistics on birth, and more, but this birth felt a little more empowering. Maybe it was because it was known terrain, maybe it was because it was 1/2 the time of my first, was it because I started labor on my own and seen that it was a "good feeling" and not a "painful feeling" as many paint it? I still have not put my finger on it, but for whatever reason that birth felt good and it made me curious for the first time, "What is really a natural childbirth? What would it be like to do this from start to finish, on my own?"

My blessings kept growing and growing. I already had a precious son, and now I had two. Now this fellow, he was cute fresh out of the womb. The first words from my mouth as they laid him on my chest were, "Honey, look at him, he is so cute". His eyes are the first things you would notice about him, they are bold and beautiful. They draw you into him and just make you want to know more about him. If you can get past those eyes of his, he has a smile to go right along with them. Hah...........my boys are going to cause me fits when they get a little older! He is a lover boy, he loves to love and be loved. He is gentle, but can go the opposite direction in a heartbeat, yes he can be stubborn as a bull. For the most part, he is mister "cheesy" smiling all the time and it is so contagious. He loves to play and eat. He does both so well, (LOL, the eating part is his daddy...............ummm, okay, me too. We love food way too much). He clings to his older brothers every move, wanting so much to do what he can do, (baseball, go to school). He is sweet and genuinly cares for others. I would not trade this fellow for nothing either.